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Doing Nothing

 
The fantasized version of waking up on Monday morning without having to go to work, with nothing you have to do, is quite nice.  Unfortunately, this week's reality isn't all that pleasant.  I was wonderful to be able to stay in bed a bit longer, and to cuddle with the furkids when I got up, but not going to work because I have no job to go to at present, comes with a heavy dose of anxiety and dread.  All the what-ifs are dancing in my head.
 
I can't honestly say that I have done nothing; there are plenty of things that needed to be done, such as filing online for unemployment benefits, continuing with the job search, and trying to figure out how to budget the money we will have coming in which, without my paycheck, isn't going to cover everything.  I've run a couple errands in town, and done a few loads of laundry, read a few blog posts and played a few turns of Words With Friends and Yahtzee.  There are endless housecleaning and de-cluttering projects waiting to be done, but my head really isn't into taking much of anything on.  Deep down I'm just beginning to come to terms with the loss of my job. 
 
Being laid-off is not something I anticipated having to deal with at this stage of my life, I don't suppose anybody really does. The angry child in me stomps her feet and says "I don't want to find another job, I don't want to have to go to work at all, I want to stay home."  It's not that I'm opposed to working, I'm just opposed to the ever-present state of stress and fatigue that comes with it. If I could find a job that was not so tiring or stressful, that would be great, but the job market here is pretty thin right now, and there are too many jobs I am not qualified or able to do.
 
I need the perfect answer, and I believe God has one for me, but what that is I don't have a clue at this point. So I will keep hunting, and watching, and praying for direction, and try to relax and breathe in these days I have off and not fear for tomorrow, and not feel guilty if I take a little time to do nothing other than improve my perspective.  But I can say with certainty that having nothing to do isn't really all that fun right now.  
~*~*~*~*~*~
I'm joining Patricia for In Other Words
where this week's writing prompt
is the following quotation by Jerome K. Jerome:

"There is no fun in doing nothing when you have nothing to do."

5 comments:

  1. Doing nothing is only fun if it's a planned time of doing nothing, or if it's a way of procrastinating on something else.

    Praying you find a job soon, one that will recharge and not drain you.

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  2. I think that all too many people can relate to this situation. When the paperwork is done, take on those chores around the house. It will occupy your time and your mind in positive ways. Cleaning and ridding your space of clutter will make you feel better. Clearing your space really does help you clear your mind, too. Positive energy is good for the mind and the body, too. (It helps get rid of fibromyalgia pain, as well.)

    I am sending you positive vibes here. Please know that. I know and understand how difficult this is, so I am trying to help boost you in positive ways. Please know that. Hugs.

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  3. I am sorry you are going through this. I pray your dream job will come along soon.

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  4. Do take some time to unwind and catch your breath. File the papers you need to get benefits and then do what you have been wanting to do around your home but haven't had time or energy to do. There has always been a plan for your life and this is part of it. The next chapter is in the works. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers...

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  5. I don't have to get up and go to work -- but 3 kids sure don't allow you to lay about in bed either! LOL But, it's not the old rush rush that working outside the home used to be. Still, I think my mind is slowly leaning towards getting back out there.. eventually. Like you, I am leaving it in His hands -- I am sure He will place me where I am supposed to be.

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Your comments are always appreciated... they make me smile! :-)