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A Test of Courage

Now comes the test.  A test of how well I can walk my own talk.  Josie the Encourager, can she lift herself out from under the cloud that descended at work today?  Can I find the energy and determination to help sort things out, while not letting the powerful powers that be get to me?  We shall see.

What is all this about?  Well, what I mentioned awhile back has come to pass.  When I started working at the law firm 2-1/2 years ago, we had two attorneys at our branch of the firm, a husband and wife team.  Shortly after the beginning of the year, the wife resigned to accept a position with another firm, for a variety or reasons, that I need not go into. Let's just say there were valid issues and concerns that prompted her to do so.  Today, her husband also resigned, effective immediately, following some failed attempts to negotiate other arrangements that would be mutually beneficial to both the attorney and the firm. 

Our branch of the firm operates at a level requiring a support staff of four.  We have been short one support person since last February.  So we have been only three, covering the work of four, and one of those also taking on some of the legal aide roles to relieve the overload of having just one attorney instead of two.  So where does that leave us now?  With no attorneys and just the three of us to try to keep things afloat while they find and hire another one, and we help get him or her up to speed.

That doesn't sound so incredibly daunting, other than yet more work overload, but tomorrow morning the head attorney and owner of our firm will be arriving to handle things for the time being.  Without telling tales, let's just say working with him gives new meaning to the word "challenging".  I do not look forward to it, we dread it, it doubles our levels of stress in facing what making this transition involves.  It is not as simple as taking down one "shingle" and hanging up another.  There are all sorts of paperwork changes, notifications, etc. that must be sent out, in addition to informing our many clients as they call in or we contact them.  It will make them very  nervous.  It makes us very nervous too. 

There is a very real likelihood that one of my coworkers will tender her resignation and jump ship.  She would not likely have a problem in finding other suitable employment with far less stress than a lighter workload than she has currently been carrying, not to mention all that will be added in the days ahead.  What then?  Where does that leave us?  With two struggling to get everything demanded of us done?  I am sixty, I am old, I am already tired.  Just the thought of what lies in the days ahead leaves me feeling numb and exhausted.  It is not going to be easy, it is  not going to be fun. 

That being said, can I talk myself into getting up tomorrow, facing it head on,  and trying to get thru it, make the best of it for the time being?  I can honestly say that tonight I do not want to, I want to say enough, throw in the towel, and stay home.  If only that were a possible option.  It is not, and job positions for old women are hard to come by.  So I will do my best to rally the troops, keep a lid on the big boss, and move forward toward calmer days. 

"It isn't what happens to us, but how we respond to it that makes the difference."  That's the message I so often preach.  "Don't give up hope... one foot in front of the other... one day at a time," and all of that.  Now we shall see what I'm made of.  Can I win the challenge, or will I walk away in defeat?  Stay tuned as this story unfolds.

7 comments:

  1. Josie, I feel for your in this situation. I can too easily imagine the dread of going to work every morning in an unpleasant environment, and in so sorry these changes have brought on that result. I think you are right to take the attitude you do, and I will follow the story as it unfolds.

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  2. Josie, how stressful for you. I feel your sixty year old tiredness - and the tiredness of the drama. Wishing you productive and happy days as the story unfolds. You could probably share some wisdom with the "bosses".

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  3. I am sorry you have to deal with this. Don't worry too much about being the cheerleader for everyone else, although I know that is one of your endearing qualities. Focus on yourself and what it will take to get you through this unscathed. I'll say a prayer for you!

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  4. I know the feeling of dreading the workplace all too well. And the whole facing that which we do not want to and trying to hold our heads up? Yeah. You know already that we are still caught in the throes of the Fab Hub's job loss and career change process. It's all just UGH isn't it? So sorry you have to face this huge pile of stress. You are in my thoughts and prayers, dear friend, always! And when it gets to be too much...breathe...pray...and go take a turn at WWF! :D

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  5. Even if, after a reasonable amount of time, you feel the situation is becoming untenable, and leave, it won't be defeat. It will be that you tried, and they put to much on anyone to handle.

    You are in my prayers.

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  6. The stress you describe is almost palpable through the screen. So sorry you're having to deal with this. Although not the same situation entirely, I can so relate to this exhaustion. One thing I was shown many years ago, that I honestly forget to practice, is to ask, when faced with these life challenges, 'What am I supposed to learn in this situation?' And then pray and ask to see it and learn from it, and apply what I have learned. Of course praying for patience and long-suffering and all of that too. And sometimes praying, "Lord, please don't let me knock so and so in the teeth today. Amen" What I know of Josie is that she is STRONG and WILL get through this. My thoughts and prayers are with you. When you need to, find a place and opportunity to break glassware (one reason I love to keep the chore of taking the recycling :} )! Very therapeutic! Hugs!

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  7. I'm so sorry. Hugs and prayers for you, friend.

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Your comments are always appreciated... they make me smile! :-)