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In My Corner

My name is Scotty. I am ten years old, and this is my bear.  His name is Brown Bear.  Ok, so I wasn't very clever at naming things when I was a little kid, but Brown Bear was my best friend, and he got me through a lot of tough times. 
 
When I was really young I lived in a house that was...  well, I guess you'd say that it was noisy. It seemed like there was always someone screaming, or yelling or crying in that house.  Dad did most of the yelling, Mama did the crying, though I did hear her scream at dad one night when he came home late; she was saying something about him drinking too much and coming home drunk.  I didn't hear everything that got said, but I heard him yelling back at her, and then I heard her crying.  They probably thought I was sound asleep in my bed upstairs, but who could sleep with all that noise.
 
At times like that, when I couldn't stand the noise anymore, I'd curl up in the corner of my room and hold Brown Bear tight, and wait for things to quiet down.  Sometimes I got kinda scared, but Brown Bear didn't care if I got his fur wet with tears, and he never told on me either. 
 
When I was about eight my Grandma came to live with us.  Mama said that Grandma was getting too old to live alone.  I loved Grandma so much and was really glad when she moved into the room across the hall from mine.  She didn't much like all that noise going on downstairs all the time either, and sometimes I would find her standing in the hallway shaking her head. 
 
One night when things were getting pretty loud between Dad and Mama, Grandma came across the hall and opened up my door and found me huddled in the corner with Brown Bear.  I was a little embarrassed, but she just smiled and sat down on my bed and talked a long time about Brown Bear and what a good friend he was.  She told me that Brown Bear was really smart and  knew a lot of things about life and people and that sometimes he might share secrets with me.  That sure got me curious, and I asked what she meant, but she just smiled and said I'd probably find out in time.
 
A few nights later I woke up to the sound of something crashing in the kitchen and it sounded like Dad must have tripped and fell.  I scrambled to the safety of my corner and grabbed Brown Bear who was waiting there for me.  As I held him close I noticed there was a small piece of paper folded up and tied to his paw with a string.  I turned on my pocket flashlight and read the note. It was printed in big round letters and I figured out that's how bears must write.  It said "I love you Scotty, and God loves you too.  You don't have to be afraid, we are going to be ok together. I like how you hug me and keep me warm.  XOXO, Brown Bear"  Wow! That made me feel a whole lot better!
 
In the weeks after that I found notes from Brown Bear almost always if I had to hide in my corner. That really helped me because things were getting more scary in our house.  One night I found a note from Brown Bear that told be to be really brave because we would soon be moving to a wonderful new life together.  I wonder how he knew that when I didn't know anything about us moving. 
 
Sure enough, just two days later Mama sat me down and told me that she and I were going to move to Grandma's house along with Grandma, that she didn't want me to live in a house with so much noise.  She said that it wasn't good for little boys, or mamas, or grandmas.  "Or bears?" I asked her. 
 
"This is definitely not a good place for bears," said Mama, and I saw her and Grandma share a smile.
 
After we moved to Grandma's house life was a lot different, there wasn't any more noise and I didn't have to hide in the corner of my room, but I always left Brown Bear sitting there just in case.  Every now and then I'd come home from school to find Brown Bear holding a note printed with his big round letters that would tell me how much he loved me and how proud he was of me. I was amazed when he knew that I got an 100 on a Spelling test or that I'd helped my Mama weed the garden. 
 
Like I said, I'm ten years old now, just about grown up.  Grandma died in her sleep and went to Heaven last year.  I miss her a lot.  The notes from Brown Bear stopped too, and I pretty much figured out that maybe she had been the one helping him do the writing, since everyone knows that bears wouldn't be very good at holding pencils with those big paws.  But even if Brown Bear doesn't leave me any more notes I know he loves me, just like Grandma promised she would love me even when she went to Heaven, and I know that she does.  
 
I think I'm going to keep Brown Bear around - even if I'm getting a little big for stuffed animals, and when I finish school and move to my own house some day I'm taking Brown Bear with me.
 
And he did.
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This post was written for Two Shoes Tuesday
where the prompts this week are corner or rescue...
Come and join us there!

10 comments:

  1. Great story! This is one of your best. Well done, Ms. Two Shoes.

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    1. Thank you Annie! I know it's a little long to read, but it felt right for this story. It was fun trying something new - from a child's perspective. :-)

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  2. Sounds like Scotty was raised about the same as me. Daddy doing all the yelling and hitting and momma crying all the time. She never left though, I did when I was 16. Never looked back for years.

    This post was right out of my childhood, except I didn't have Brown Bear and I'm a girl. Excellent.

    Have a terrific day honey. Big hugs. ☺

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    1. Thank you Sandee, for confirming that this conveys a sense of reality. How I wish it wasn't the reality for any child anywhere! I'm glad you left home when you were finally old enough to go. I left with my children to give them a less noisy house too. Although my parents didn't resort to violence, I remember many nights of us standing at the top of the stairs in our nightgowns, listening to mom and dad arguing down below, it was very upsetting to us. They probably never realized that we were wide awake, thanks to them.

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  3. Grandmas are very special people and stuffed animals were always my favorite toys!

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    1. Grandma's do indeed have the biggest hearts ever, Karen! :-) I loved stuffed animals now ever more than I did when I was small. Papa Bear laughs when I start cuddling up to one in a store with pleading eyes, more often than not it will be coming home with me! Maybe that's why I love cats so much, they are soft and cuddly and interactive, no batteries required... just food and snacks! :-))

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  4. Cool story! I like the picture of the brown bear. Scotty reminds me of me when I was ten. I used to collect stuffed animals and my room was full of them, but there was always a special animal that I liked that disappeared randomly one day. Maybe it moved, or ran away. JK!
    : )

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    1. I love bears, Joseph, I have over 100 Beanie Bears, and several bigger ones, and of course I have Papa Bear now too! He says I like him because he is furry! :-) My younger sister had many stuffed animals when she was young, and it pains me to admit that we would sometimes tease her by moving them around to strange places in the house. Maybe your animal went to stay with someone that really needed some extra care, or maybe it decided to go to the beach! :-)

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  5. I suppose you could or I could put Old Grizz in the category as special. naturally this story wrapped itself around my heart and I enjoyed reading it.

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    1. Old Grizz is indeed very special, and he has a heart of pure gold! I'm glad you appreciated my little story here, there are more children who live with these realities than any of us wish were true. Now if we just had big tough grizzly bears on the police force to take out some of those meanies, maybe it would be a more effective way of dealing with them!

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Your comments are always appreciated... they make me smile! :-)