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The Space In Between

Today is Mother's Day, yet another holiday that is sweetness tinged with sadness.  I think that tends to come with age. My own mother died nearly twenty years ago, my paternal grandmother several years before that, and my maternal grandmother when I was very young - I barely remember her. John's mother also died more than twenty years ago, so there is no one to visit or call, or to send gifts and flowers.  The mother of two of John's daughters, that he was married to for twenty eight years, died twelve year ago.  Precious women that are no longer in our lives.

Our own five children are grown and scattered to the wind, none within close driving distance. I will hear from them today, and have received cards and gifts in the mail.  They are thoughtful, caring children, all of them, and in that we are so very blessed.  But they are not here to share the day with me.  On a day designed to celebrate motherhood, it is too quiet, and their absence is too keenly felt.

My heart replays memories of my own childhood, and of my children's childhood too. I am almost sixty now, how did all those years pass so quickly? 

We have grandchildren, six of them, that are technically John's, but who have all been gracious to accept me as their own.  I also have one child and one grandchild in Heaven that I didn't have the privilege of knowing in this life, but will someday. How I look forward to that! 

Tomorrow, there is a new life coming into the world... John's oldest grandson is about to become a father for the first time, his son is scheduled to make an appearance in the morning, or as his delightful mom states it, he is going to be "evicted" from his nice comfy space and lifted kicking and howling into the world, ready or not.  That would be enough to make me cry too!

Tomorrow, we will officially become great-grandparents... that is a wonderful reason to celebrate, even though we will have to be content with pictures and reports as this little guy will enter the world in Arkansas, too far for us to witness is birth.  He'll be joining a very excited big brother who turns four in a couple weeks... and a new generation begins.

But for today, it is quiet here, and as a mother I find myself somewhere in the space in between.

8 comments:

  1. You are blessed in many ways. Some people have some of these blessings, some have none. Though "in between" you have a space, and it is filled with love.

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    1. You are so very right, McGuffy Ann, I have much to be thankful for.

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  2. Happy Mother's Day, friend.

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    1. Thank You, Dana, I hope you had a nice one too!

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  3. Happy Mother's Day, dear friend. Hope it was a blessed day.

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    1. It turned out to be a nice day after getting past the morning blues, Carrie. Living far away from family has been a fact of my life since I was twenty years old, but I never quite adjust to doing holidays alone. Now that our kids are gone, we are so very thankful to have each other!

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  4. It changes all the time, doesn't it? Life as wheel, each one of us playing different parts...

    Greetings from Minneapolis,

    Pearl

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  5. Things change indeed. It was quiet here too, but I'd already talked with my son before we headed to the boat this weekend. We spent a nice quiet day together and just enjoyed each others company. The head of security came to our boat yesterday and gave me a long stemmed red rose. That just made my day.

    You'll love being a great grandparent. A. Lot.

    Have a terrific day my friend. Big hugs. :)

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Your comments are always appreciated... they make me smile! :-)